Starting Over

I like beginnings.
But what I love more than anything else
is beginning AGAIN
it's when you begin with your scabs fully healed
or maybe not yet fully healed
but you stop talking about the unhealed scabs
and you just put yourself out there
again
silently knowing
that the next bruise will be from a different fall
and that maybe next time, there will be lesser cuts
because you know the drill
you learned how it is to balance
and that on your next biggest crash
you will get back up smiling
because you've been there before
and you know you will get through it
and this time you will fight to win whatever
and you pray
oh you pray
every time you get back up
that you remain softer every time

Oh I love beginning again

Going on '17

Welcoming 2017 felt a lot like welcoming a long-distance-friend that promised to be there for you to make things right at the end of the 2016. It feels uncanny how 2016 was like a horrible experience everybody in the world shared and just wanted to bury somewhere they  never want to visit again.

I would be idealistic if I told you that 2017 is the year I will change my life. But hey, yes I am idealistic and that's why I have a vibe that never dies even when things go wrong. This is why I am taking all of my idealistic principles and ways with me on 2017, but now my feet is touching Earth. So many experiences in 2016 brought me into a point where I had to compromise with how the world really works and how I can never control the reactions of people no matter how hard I try.

2016 was the year of acceptance and letting go. I have finally let go of my false idea of myself and about friendship and love. I felt really unburdened because those misconceptions have been with me for the longest time and it felt freeing to finally say goodbye to them and be less upset about things happening beyond my control.

I know I may still stumble a lot on 2017 and the years to come but I also know that it will be very hard to make the same mistakes. 

I am pretty good at learning from my mistakes.

2017. We've been together for 7 days now and you feel promising. Whatever you have in store for me, all the good and the bad, I will meet them with a brave spirit.